Woman, Live!

Stop Checking The Box

I love reading things that change the way I relate to people and in turn enhance my relationships. Today while scrolling through my Facebook timeline, I saw an article that will change my conversations forever. This article was originally featured on Momastery, then The Huffington Post, and now here! You know it’s a good article when it’s duplicated on multiple sites!

So, you know how people say, “How was your day?” and you say, “It was good.” Yeah, that’s whack! It doesn’t really mean anything. It surely doesn’t help us connect with one another. And, most of the time my entire day was too much to sum up in one sentence. And, we all know when someone really didn’t want to know all the details of your day. Those eyes start rolling around like marbles. So, Glennon and her husband found a way to really discuss their day with one another.

They ask different questions…

___________________________________________________________________________________

When did you feel loved today?

When did you feel lonely?

What did I do today that made you feel appreciated?

What did I say that made you feel unnoticed?

What can I do to help you right now?

How did you feel during your spelling test?

What did you say to the new girl when you all went out to recess?

Did you feel lonely at all today?

Were there any times you felt proud of yourself today?

And I never ask my friends: “How are you?” Because they don’t know either.

Instead I ask:

How is your mom’s chemo going?

How’d that conference with Ben’s teacher turn out?

What’s going really well with work right now?

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

From now on, I’ll ask questions that say I’m not just asking to ask or check the box, but I’m asking because I am genuinely concerned. I hope you’ll do the same!

Here’s to more meaningful conversations!

Love,

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10 thoughts on “Stop Checking The Box

  1. I do this with my kids…I never ask how their day was because that’s just so vague! And, I keep up with their world so I know when they have tests, and who their friends are and what level of video games they’re playing! It definitely makes for more meaningful conversations!!

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    • I agree! I’ve found myself saying, “How are you?” and then saying, “Don’t answer that. What was the best part of your day?” It really requires people to think and you learn so much more!

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  2. I feel like ask generic questions to all ny friends even though I know more details about their individual situations. My new year’s resolution was to repair broken/distant friendships and asking more detailed questions will help me fix the gap with my friends! #winning

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  3. Pingback: 5 Reasons We Shouldn’t Stay in Our Own Lane | Woman, Live!

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